I think expectations sort of come with the whole “love package” if you will. It’s tough to love someone when they don’t have the same feelings back, as you feel like your emotion is going out in vain and thus being wasted. I think it then turns into a “I should find someone who feels the same way about me” mindset.

That being said, I think there are different levels of love. If you can love someone and NOT expect anything back initially, then I think that’s the key to “loving freely.” It’s when you have premature expectations or hopes that this other person is in turn going to play a major role in your life, that loving freely can be difficult. Even if you tell yourself you’re NOT going to get your hopes up, I think it can happen naturally, and often times you’re not even consciously aware of it.

I’d like to say more on the subject… so maybe I’ll do a “follow-up” comment tomorrow…. do people even do those?

It’s late, I’m tired, and I have no idea why I’m still awake…. hope that made sense!
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Love is not reciprocal, it never caters expectation, it has no conditions, it does not follow any reason. In every relationship that we are in, it is not love that binds, but rather obligations. The one thing that prevents us from experiencing love is the feeling of guilt. Love is never about attraction, it is about sacrifice, it is about growth, it is about stepping beyond our self. It is about extending our self to others for the pure experience of oneness.
Walter´s last blog ..Self mastery: the feared path

I read something once: “I don’t love you because I need you … I need you because I love you.”
It seems like a lot of people love other people mainly because they need them, and not the other way around.

I agree with you that love is not logical … maybe we ARE trying to make it logical? *shrugs*
But thanks for your comment! It gave me some things to think about…

It is hard to love freely because of people having their defenses up. I like the way Alex put it how our egos feel a need to separate itself from other people. A part of me wonders how much of an excuse is it to say that other people having their defenses up. Of course, technically 99% of love is give or take (the more you give, the more you will get back eventually). But the way we use it by keeping score of who gets what and how often is a destructive cycle. That’s what’s (figuratively) killing a lot of people. This attitude of “I won’t do or say X until he/she does or says Y” etc.

When you bring up balanced power, that just tells me it’s conditional love. I feel that with unconditional love, power shouldn’t really even be in the equation…. much less a balance of power. Power is an ego phenomenon.

Interesting topic you chose to write about! I certainly think that you do not always do something because you want to, but sometimes you do it because its right or ethical.

Like supporting your partners dream of their business or their pursuit of something they really cherish, but you honestly think its a dumb idea. Then you will support them because you of course love them, but not neccessarily their idea.

I think though that with love, its not logical, its emotional, so it doesnt make much sense to question it logically. I think it is best to trust your subconcious and your instinct and just go with it, if it feels good and right, stick with it, if it feels bad, try and find out why and then take another path!

Have an awesome weekend
Cheers
Diggy
Diggy – Upgradereality.com´s last blog ..12 Favorite posts on UpgradeReality

You say the blind lead the blind? Because we constantly think we have figured it all out, and think it’s time to teach others. Someone finds some product that seems ot work and now all their friends and family know or bought it.

The very few, and I am convinced the very few open their eyes. Some of the few get scared and close their eyes again because it’s easier to not know nad be told then to realize what is going on.

You speak of this give and take love relationship. The reality most relationships are based on this about 99%. You are always giving something of yourself in exchange for something else.

Everyone has an ego, some know who to control their ego and their emotions. Some can’t.

They start comparing how much they give to how much they got and think they are being undervalued.

You give because you can, because you want to help that person and you know that they need it.

I told you how i drive my mom every morning to work, I do it because I know it helps her and I enjoy doing it (Driving that is) and even spending time with her since she does work a lot.

But you can get all technical and most people do. Parents telling their kids “I work x hours a day and therefor you must…”

This is not giving this is giving something to maintain control and power, your ego. In a relationship its a struggle for power, it is ideal when the power is balanced or when both persons care less who is more powerful, contribute more or who makes more money or whatever.

About freely loving it rather hard when everyone has their defenses up. Ever meet someone and maybe after a while you start enjoying them, but at first you were being nice?

Everyone is operating into one. One individually. The earth is MY home, this is MY money, MY car. It’s funny how people are so possessive about what they think they own. You own nothing. You are just using what is on this earth but everyone is invested in the stupid illusion that they own thing that they are better and more special then everyone else and they deserve more.

When you break the illusion, and start to understand you are at peace. Just look at the monks and people like this. They are like gods compared to the rest.

Sorry for the long comment but I always have a lot to say .
Mac´s last blog ..Life is an Ever Growing Puzzle…

I definitely agree ego and separation plays a big part in it. I’m trying separate myself from that “separation” mindset (haha), but there’s no right way to get there and that’s where it gets confusing, I think. How do you get started on that when everyone else arounds you seems to be so closed off that you feel no other choice than to be closed off yourself? Sure, you need to start looking inside yourself, but you can see how overwhelming this is. We all have years of conditioning and centuries of social barriers built up that we need to overcome. Learning to live constructively just isn’t going to happen overnight. It is a process, but you’re right – what better time than to start right now?

Your article sounds interesting … will be checking it out! Again, thanks for stopping by.

really love your site. beautiful, simple, superslick design and honest, raw content.

why are we doing it? man. i think the answer to that question – why we’re bad to other people – is pretty much the answer to LIFE haha.

i just wrote a massive article trying to get to the bottom of it called “You are not the enemy: a festival in the desert & becoming superhuman”

…and i think it comes down to living constructively versus destructively. being bad towards others is living in an overall mode of destructiveness that stems from our deep concepts of separation and wanting to protect ourselves. limitation and ego separation yuck. good news is you can decided to live constructively. starting right now.

awwwsomeness.

keep well and in touch valerie
alex – unleash reality